Geek Fest & A Big Stick
We finally did it. Sunday we were invited to a friend’s house to watch the Lord of the Rings extended edition. Yes, all 12 hours. There was plenty of sausage, strawberries, and of course po-ta-toes. It’s a great story, which to my discredit I have never read all the way through. Reading wasn’t exactly encouraged in our house. In fact, it was often discouraged while I was growing up. My mother nearly blew a gasket when she saw me reading The Wizard of Earthsea by Ursula Leguin. Her eyes flared up and she belched “That’s not one of those magic books is it? You’d better not be reading that witchcraft trash.” Witchcraft indeed; little Ged is going to team up with Gandalf and turn me into a devout Slitherin.
You see my parents are the kind of Christians that give Christians a bad name. I know this because my extended family is pretty religious. My parents currently attend my great uncle’s church, where my father’s brother is a board member. They’re nice happy normal people. I disagree with my uncle on just about everything even remotely connected to religion, theology, philosophy, or politics, but I can still have a conversation with him and not once feel the urge to throttle him. My parents on the other hand haven’t mastered that ‘plays well with others’ command.
Anyhow, before I get off track I want to tell you about an early discrepancy I discovered in my parents beliefs. I was a pretty good kid growing up. I never really got in any trouble in school; my grades were always good, etc. Still, I had the occasional (I think normal) spat with mommy dearest. Whenever she was losing an argument, she would hold her hand up with her palm facing me, close her eyes and say “In the name of Jesus be gone.”
Her dismal grasp of the New Testament left her to believe that any disagreement I had with her had to be the work of some devilry, most likely demonic possession. When she opened her eyes I always did my best to cock my head, smile, and say “I’m still here M.” It really hurt my feelings sometimes. I couldn’t have my own opinion. I had to be possessed by the devil. If that isn’t magic, I need a new dictionary. I wish she could see the LOTR scene where Gandalf casts Sauroman out of Theoden King.
Lucky for me she never carried a staff.
You see my parents are the kind of Christians that give Christians a bad name. I know this because my extended family is pretty religious. My parents currently attend my great uncle’s church, where my father’s brother is a board member. They’re nice happy normal people. I disagree with my uncle on just about everything even remotely connected to religion, theology, philosophy, or politics, but I can still have a conversation with him and not once feel the urge to throttle him. My parents on the other hand haven’t mastered that ‘plays well with others’ command.
Anyhow, before I get off track I want to tell you about an early discrepancy I discovered in my parents beliefs. I was a pretty good kid growing up. I never really got in any trouble in school; my grades were always good, etc. Still, I had the occasional (I think normal) spat with mommy dearest. Whenever she was losing an argument, she would hold her hand up with her palm facing me, close her eyes and say “In the name of Jesus be gone.”
Her dismal grasp of the New Testament left her to believe that any disagreement I had with her had to be the work of some devilry, most likely demonic possession. When she opened her eyes I always did my best to cock my head, smile, and say “I’m still here M.” It really hurt my feelings sometimes. I couldn’t have my own opinion. I had to be possessed by the devil. If that isn’t magic, I need a new dictionary. I wish she could see the LOTR scene where Gandalf casts Sauroman out of Theoden King.
Lucky for me she never carried a staff.
posted by Sylow_P | 1:19 PM
2 Comments:
So that's why you got so pissed when Doc Robbins said, “In the name of Jesus be gone” to our class that day.
You gotta admit she's got a pretty good idea for a thing there... too bad it just doesn't work. What if we play with the name thing: "In the name of Bob, be gone!" "In the name of Diana Ross, be gone!" "In the name of WonderWoman, be gone!"
Did any of those work?
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