Just when you think you're out... Rebuttal

Here it is, a guest post from the man himself, Mr. Sparkle Stone.

I self-imposed a blogging day of rest yesterday. I have a
problem. That statement always reminds me of this guy I once knew who was addicted to hairspray. He was a housemate of mine and another housemate once walked into the addict's bathroom and found the floor (and all other surfaces to feel like the floor at a movie theater). He yelled out, "What the fuck?!?" And our addict was forced to admit, "I have a problem."

I have a problem. So, I took a day off.

Sylow tested my resolve and, may I say, tested it well. It was difficult to resist. At one point, all I could do to avoid the overwhelming urge to comment was to strangle one of my co-workers.

Today, I am a new man. Still, some things need answering:

This is what I said about grits and polenta, "If you smoke any more crack, your brains are going to turn into grits, or polenta...same difference." I meant that it didn't matter which sort of mush her brains turned into, mush was mush. Being a crackhead, she focused on the wrong thing.

The electronic door opener thing is true. My sister's friend’s husband DID it.

Sylow refers to my love of making homemade biscuits, [Administrator's note: sometimes spelled 'bagels', but pronounced 'beeskut'], and then smothering them in Spaghetti-Os. Something which many people find strange and repulsive but I feel will one day be validated as a great invention.

Sylow also mentions that I begged him to allow me to do the cataloguing for his toenail digital library project but failed to mention how it didn't require much begging. He also didn't mention our startling discovery: overall cleanliness isn't as big a factor on taste as you might think.

The stick thing goes too far. In the rough and tumble streets of Long Island, good times were few and far between. I won't stand to have them ridiculed.

Sparklestone

There you have it, straight from the horse's mouth. Don't worry about those few comments Sparky may have failed to address. He's still coming to grips with a few things.