Caught in the Act

She says she saw me, my wife that is. She says she saw me with a girl in front of a club. It's incomprehensible. I remember the club. I even remember the girl. Having my wife see me in front of that club pretending to be intimate with someone who's clearly not her... I do not have that memory.

The name of the club is lost to me, or it was I should say. I have been reminded of course, but it would have otherwise endured as a blank stare to the question "Where have you been?" I thought I was only there once. I hope I was only there once.

"You must be mistaken."

"I saw you and that girl sucking tongues in front of the club."****

“In public? I don’t think so.”

The club is memorable. Not because I enjoyed it, but because I really didn't enjoy it. I remember going there once with a couple of important friends. Important not only for their impact on my survival as an affiliate of the human race, but because they happened to have one thing I did not, QVT (quality vehicular transport), and they shamelessly drove me wherever my feet refused to take me. Basically, they were my connection to society, which means if they didn’t give me a ride I didn’t get to go. I think the QVT driver might have actually enjoyed the club a little less than I did. We share a general distrust of dumb people in large groups, and a dance club has the ability to congregate the very worst offenders. The fact that neither of us dance is a side note at best. It doesn’t strike me as the type of place I would frequent.

I suppose the end result of the club's existence was potentially noteworthy. The club is that harbor you find in any uber conservative town. It's that sole refuge for the straight, the bent, and the fabulously twisted to meet and share their common disgust of anyone truly afraid to walk through its doors. I can't say I enjoyed it immensely (because of the large groups of people), but part of me says we definitely need more of them scattered throughout the map. Without a doubt I definitely remember the club.

In all truthfulness, the only girl I remember thinking about at that club was my wife. I remember watching her dance. I didn't tell her that because, hey would you believe that if you were my wife? I just don’t remember any kissing.

Still she says she saw me, with that girl in front of that club. My wife isn't by any means intimidated by that girl. She knows to much about her. She knows too much about me. The whole thing is actually kind of funny. My wife admits she could be confused about the who and when. After all, this was in 1998. Our relationship back then was less than a twinkle in each other's eye (she had a boyfriend, so my eye twinkled a bit brighter, I think :).

I don't think I'm old enough to have to worry about what I don't remember.

Still, I worry.

**** In light of my follow-up post this wording is clearly NOT what the wife said. Perhaps she said "I thought you and that girl..." I would never knowingly accuse her of saying something she did not say.